Avoid the Bridezilla Stress
The thought of planning “the perfect day” can be a daunting task. If you follow any kind of wedding page you will see memes all of the time about how stressful it is to plan a wedding. And that there is not enough wine in the world to cope with the process. Wedding planning is something that should be a fun and exciting time in your life, not something you dread! Many brides (and their families) are worried about their inner bridezilla coming out. But what they don’t know is that this bridal beast is easily tamed with a few tips and tricks.
#1 It is YOUR wedding day!
All too often I see brides giving in to their mothers wishes or the stubborn bridesmaid that CANNOT be in strapless. Simply because they want to please everyone or don’t want to deal with the drama. And they forget what the day is really about; the love that they have for their soon to be husband or wife. I am not saying to not listen to any advice your family and friends have to offer but instead to give them your honest opinion about that idea. If you don’t want a church wedding don’t let anyone convince you otherwise! You are never going to make everyone happy and that is okay! As long as you and your significant other can look back in 20, 30, 70 years and say “that was such a special day” that is all that matters.
#2 Use a QUALITY checklist - and check it twice!
Be on top of your planning timeline. If you try to plan a wedding all at once that is when you are going to get overloaded. If you take your time and space out what needs to get done it won’t be as overwhelming. And you will find that you have time to make the decisions you need to make. It is never any fun to be told that what you want can’t happen because you waited too long. Don’t be the bride that puts things off until the last second, it will only save you the headache in the long run. Plus, it is okay to be ahead of schedule! If you want to go dress shopping two years out do it! There is nothing wrong with checking things off your list early I promise you won’t be missing out on anything by waiting.
#3 Be realistic- set a budget and stick to it
Setting yourselves a realistic budget is important. This means sitting down and discussing which areas are most AND least important to you. For example, do you want to spend more of your budget on food because you and your soon to be are huge foodies. Or would you rather spend more money on photography and videography so you can look back and remember your special day with your kids. Or maybe a big expensive dress isn’t important to you…so spend that money in another area. It is important to set a budget for each category. This will help you have more realistic expectations for what you are getting and help you stay on budget. Another thing to remember is that if family is helping out with paying for the wedding sit down and discuss with them what areas they are going to be involved in. Just because they are contributing doesn’t mean that they get to make all of the decisions.
#4 Trust your vendors
They are professionals and I’m positive that you hired them for a reason. They know what they are doing so trust them to take the pictures and play the songs that you want. And if you are concerned about something specific bring it up in the consultation. We are always more than happy to give advice about what has worked and what hasn’t for couples in the past. I’m sure that this isn’t their first rodeo your photographer might have a great idea for a shot that is a little odd to you just go with it!
#5 Take a break and remember what a wedding is about.
Sure you want to impress your family and friends and maybe even have a better dress than your friend. But as I have said before and I will say it again, your wedding day is about the love you and your soon to be spouse share for each other. If you start to get overwhelmed with all of the details and maybe your future mother in law… take a breath…relax and just remember why you are having this party. Take some time for yourself! There are all sorts of fun things that you can do to relax and it counts as getting wedding ready! Like yoga, massages, spa days, mani pedis with (or without) your bridesmaids, meditation.
#6 Don't sweat the small stuff-- your wedding will still be fabulous!
So one of the flowers that you like isn’t in season or doesn’t come in your wedding colors. I promise it is going to be okay and the florals will still be beautiful. While I am all about the small details nobody is going to be upset if you don’t have programs or if the font on the invitations isn’t perfect. Another example is timeline. It is a wedding things are bound to get behind. Especially if you are having your wedding in a space where the room has to be flipped from the ceremony to the reception. It is 100% okay if the sign you made says cocktail hour at 6pm and dinner at 7pm but you don’t get up to dinner until 7:15pm because your ceremony ran longer. I promise your guests will understand. And just as importantly don’t let the opinions of loved ones get to you! Because that is all they are, opinions! If someone doesn’t like your dress that doesn’t mean that it is not your dress. YOU are the one that is going to be wearing it ALL day! You are the only one that has to LOVE it!
#7 Invest in a wedding planner - if you think it is right for you
One of the major perks of hiring a wedding planner is that they worry about all of the details for you. They have connections with great vendors in your area which cuts out the research phase which is usually the most time consuming. Let them handle getting quotes, initial consultations, and the little things. Planners are a great option for busy couples that simply don’t have the time to sit on Pinterest, or on Google searching for what they want. Planning your wedding should be enjoyable, fun, and memorable. You want to remember how much fun you had doing it not how stressed you were with all of the details.
#8 Choose your bridal party wisely….
You should never feel obligated to ask someone to be in your bridal party. I know it is easier said than done but, if you are hesitant about it now you should trust your gut. It is not like they won’t be invited to the wedding. We have all heard horror stories of bridesmaids and even maids of honor being kicked out or dropping out of weddings because there was too much drama. So if you are worried that one of your girls might be an issue save yourself the headache and don’t ask them! Nobody should expect to be in your bridal party it is an honor to be selected.
#9 And UTILIZE THEM - don’t be afraid to ASK for help!
Your bridesmaids are there to help you along the way. Their job is more than just buying a dress, standing next to you and posing for pictures. Let them help you! But make sure that you are asking them, nobody likes to be told what to do. Ask them if they could help you make centerpieces or pick out songs for the morning playlist. There is no need for you to handle everything by yourself when you have a bridal party that is usually more than willing to help you! They are in your party because you love them and they love you and they want your big day to be nothing but spectacular.
#10 Let yourself relax and enjoy the day
This is a day that is only going to happen once! You don’t want to spend the day controlling every detail and micromanaging. Relax have a glass of champagne and look at the BEAUTIFUL wedding that you planned! Let your vendors and even your bridal party handle anything that might not go according to plan. Not to say that it will but if it does, trust that you are in good hands. Everyone at your wedding wants it to be perfect for you just trust them and enjoy the party! Like I have said several times already, you are celebrating the love you and your husband or wife have for each other and that is what is most important. This is the first day of your new lives together. So no matter what happens let it be the happiest day of your life!
